Let’s Play Pretend: a Satire of Google’s Second EU Search Remedy Proposal

For satire to work, one has to have something to work with. Well Google doesn’t disappoint!

Please don’t miss the grins and aha-s from this playful satire -- here.

• It makes what Google wishes was boring and of no interest, fun, illuminating and highly-problematic for Google’s proposed settlement with the EU.  

Google’s 96-page second remedy proposal to settle the EU’s antitrust concerns largely boils down to one twelve-word, total-absolution-statement, in the preamble of Google’s official “Commitments,” that if accepted by the EU, effectively would take the force of EU law in relation to Google.

• That sentence is “… the Commission will confirm that there are no grounds for further action…”  

Specifically, the proposal would pretend Google is not a dominant firm despite its >90% share, that it has done nothing wrong, and that it has no liability for its abuse of its dominance in four different ways.  That is not a true, fair or just settlement.

Google’s total-absolution proposal would be much worse than the status quo, because if accepted by the EU, it would legitimize and entrench Google’s 90+% dominance of search and search advertising in Europe, bless its extension of dominance into competitive markets, and make it near impossible for any semblance of natural online competition to ever take root in Europe for the benefit of European consumers. 

• Satire is warranted because Google’s proposal is so far beyond the pale that one must use metaphors, imagery and analogies to understand what is really going on and what Google is really proposing.

Please enjoy my new 12-page pictorial Power Point presentation: “Satire II: Grading Google’s Search Antitrust Remedies In the EU Second Market Test” – here.

• It is part 13 of my Googleopoly Series below.

GOOGLEOPOLY RESEARCH SERIES

Googleopoly I: The Google-DoubleClick Anti-competitive Case – 2007

Googleopoly II: Google’s Predatory Playbook to Thwart Competition – 2008

Googleopoly III: Dependency: The Crux of the Google-Yahoo Ad Agreement Problem – 2008

Googleopoly IV: How Google Extends its Search Monopoly to Monopsony Control over Digital Info—2009

Googleopoly V: Why the FTC Should Block Google-AdMob – 2009

Googleopoly VI: Seeing the Big Picture: How Google is Monopolizing Consumer Internet Media –2010

Googleopoly VII:  Monopolizing Location Services – Why Skyhook is Google’s Netscape –2011

Googleopoly VIII: Google’s Deceptive and Predatory Search Practices – 2011

Googleopoly IX: Google-Motorola’s Patents of Mass Destruction -- 2012

Googleopoly X: Google’s Dominance is Spreading at an Accelerating Rate -- 2013

Googleopoly XI: a Satire: Grading Google’s Search Antitrust Remedies in EU Market Test – 2013

Googleopoly XII: Google-YouTube’s Internet Video Distribution Dominance -- 2013